INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION

INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION

Interpersonal communication is the communication between two persons. It can take place in any environment, and in any place. But it mostly takes place in face-to-face encounters. It is often spontaneous, unplanned, and loosely organized. It does not follow rules of grammar or other such formal restrictions. The participants are mostly face-to-face in interpersonal communication (except in case of interpersonal mediated communication through telephone, mail, email etc.). So they can use all five senses to send and receive messages. Also such situations are informal in nature. Most interpersonal communication occurs between two persons in close contact (dyad). Thus the responsibilities of sending, receiving, processing, evaluating, providing feedback, etc. are shared between the participants. Here both the participants alternate their roles as sender and receiver.

Interpersonal communication mostly involves sharing of meaning. It also involves guiding, counseling, passing instructions or orders, problem solving, decision making, etc.

 FUNCTIONS OF INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION:

Interpersonal communication helps understanding people with whom we are communicating in a better way. It helps us understanding situations or events in a better way. It helps us think better and evaluate more effectively. It is also used to change behaviour. Communication scholars Frank E.X. Dance and Carl E. Larson have identified three main functions of interpersonal communication. 

These are:

• Linking function,

• Mentation function, and

• Regulatory function.

The linking function helps an individual to know his or her environment better and get connected to it. The mentation function helps in conceptualizing, remembering, planning, etc. The regulatory function is about controlling our own and other's behaviour. Intrapersonal communication is the ‘platform’ on which all other levels or forms are based. Interpersonal communication is also the basis of our growth and survival. We are nurtured - physically, emotionally, and intellectually - through interpersonal communication. Also through interpersonal communication we develop our links and

contacts with the world around us. And without interpersonal communication, we would be cut off from the world.

 INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS:

Interpersonal communication creates, nurtures, and even destroys relationships. The factors that play important roles here are control, trust, and intimacy (by E. Rogers-Millar and Frank Millar, 1976). While control deals with the distribution of power between two persons sharing a relationship, trust is the belief that the other person will not exploit. The third factor, intimacy is the degree to which two persons sharing a relationship are willing to meet each other's needs. These three factors affect interpersonal relationships to a great extent. Other elements (variables) that affect interpersonal relationships are self disclosure, feed back, non verbal behaviour, interpersonal attraction.

Self disclosure helps reduce anxiety; increase comfort levels; and intensifies interpersonal attractions. Feed back in interpersonal relationships involves agreeing, asking questions, responding, etc. Non verbal behaviour which includes facial expressions, gestures, postures, eye contact, use of space, etc. plays an important role. It can supplement or complement verbal communication. It sometimes can completely replace verbal communication. Often a hug, a pat on the back, a glance or a firm handshake can achieve much more than what words come. Interpersonal attraction is the special quality that attracts authors towards an individual. It is often referred as a 'special chemistry' as in case of 'love at first sight'. This attraction, however, is not always immediate. It can take a lot of time, may be years, before two persons get attracted to each other.

PHASES OF INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP DEVELOPMENT:

• Initiating,

• Experimenting,

• Intensifying,

• Integrating, and

• Bonding.

In the initiating phase, an individual makes conscious and unconscious judgements about the other. In this phase, the communication could be either nonverbal, verbal or both.

 In the experimenting phase, the participants talk about general things (this is usually referred as small talk) while trying to find out common interests. Also, both participants try to determine whether continuing the relationship would be beneficial.

The third phase is the intensifying phase. It involves increased awareness of both participants about each other and increased involvement in conversation. Self disclosure by both participants results in trust and creates rapport. The participants become more informal and open as experiences, assumptions, expectations are shared. At this stage, there is increased intimacy. This includes intimate non verbal behaviour like touching, nodding, physical proximity, etc.

In the integrating stage, both the participants try to meet the other's expectations. The final stage is the bonding phase. Here serious commitments and sacrifices are made. Examples of bonding are 'promise to remain friends', ‘marriage’, etc. These five stages may take of few seconds, or

may take years.

PHASES OF INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP DISINTEGRATION:

Like in interpersonal relationship development, five phases are involved in interpersonal relationship disintegration also. These are:

• Differentiating,

• Circumscribing,

• Stagnating,

• Avoiding, and

• Terminating.

These five stages of interpersonal relationship disintegration can take a few minutes or even a few years depending upon the kind of relationship. Here the participants get separated from each other in phases. The main reason behind this separation is differences. These differences exist even at the development of relationship stages. But the participants generally ignore them or these differences are over-shadowed by the factors that are common to both participants.

So the first phase of relational disintegration is differentiating. Here the differences become prominent. At this stage, the participants want more freedom. Also both participants try to test each other's involvement and commitment in the relationship.

The next stage is circumscribing. Here the participants practice controlled communication and less communication. Also both participants try to reduce conflict and tension while trying to maintain 'normalcy' in front of others. But in private there is little communication, even at the non-verbal level.

This stage leads to stagnating. Here all communication is stopped. The next phase is avoiding. Both participants try to ignore each other. They behave as if the other participant does not exist. Both participants avoid interaction and also maintain physical distance. Stagnating leads to the final stage i.e. termination. This may come suddenly or it may be delayed. This depends upon the type of relationship, the strength of the relationship, the effects of dissociation, etc.

LEVELS OF INTERPERSONAL INTERACTION:

It is said that interpersonal communication is the most fruitful and effective of all forms of communication. This is because the participants are face-to-face and there is every chance of clearing the doubts. Also the feedback is instantaneous. However, in different interpersonal situations, the

communication or interaction takes place differently. These are:

• Alternating monologue,

• Stimulus-response interaction,

• Interaction with feedback, and

• Interaction with empathy.

Alternating monologue is the exchange of only those messages that are absolutely necessary. There is no commonness established during such a situation. No understanding or sharing takes place during alternating monologues. This is also the least productive type of interpersonal interaction.Stimulus-response interaction takes place in need-based ommunication situations. Such situations are mostly routine and formal in ature. Here both the messages and feedback are mostly standardized. Here only a mere exchange of information takes place. Interactions with feedback are of more common nature. Here the sender-participant sends a message and the receiver-participant provides appropriate feedback. This feedback leads to continuation of the communication cycle. This way there is more and fruitful exchange of information.

Interaction with empathy is the most productive of all interpersonal interaction situations. Here both the participants try to empathize with each other, i.e., to understand each other's needs, expectations, limitations, etc. They also try to identify each other's feelings; thoughts etc. and share each

other's pains and joys.